Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Marriage and School Shootings

Marriage, what's it for? That's been an issue for debate, especially recently. I'm not gonna get deep into that, but just let me say the reason for marriage isn't about making babies, getting a tax break or getting BAQ and Sep Rats and moving off post (military reference there).

Primarily, it's for raising a family. Like I said here, it has a lot to do with the roles filled by the husband and wife. But that's only part of it.

There's also the process of conflict resolution. In todays one-parent household, there's no model for conflict resolution. If there was even a marriage in the first place, the result of conflict resulted in a permanent condition. The family was broken. I remember when I was a kid, my parents spoke in hushed voices when talking about a kid from a "broken home". Today? Not so much.

But, I digress.

So, here we are, as kids, watching any difference of opinion end up with a permanent solution. Usually, it's the man who takes action, as men are prone to do. They say "screw it" and leave, never to come back.

So, taking that behavior and moving it into a classroom, how can a young man permanently resolve a conflict there? They can't walk out, and they can't force the other party/parties to leave either. But, that's the only way they've seen conflict resolved. One party must leave.

That's where pop culture references to violence come in. Yes, they play a part, no they are not the cause. Just like the mainstream media, they can't tell what to think, but they can tell you what to think about. So, these kids think about the Matrix shoot-em-up, Grand Theft Auto, or whatever else is out there now.

They steal or buy a few guns and go fix their problem. Permanently.

This isn't a gun issue, it's a family issue. It's the fault of no-fault divorce and the acceptance of adultery into the norm. This isn't something that will be fixed by more laws and metal detectors. It can only be fixed by parents, both parents, sorting things out like grown people are supposed to do. That's an example for your kids to emulate.

Focus on family, not firearms.


elliot said...

"Focus on family, not firearms."

Good rule!

Also, don't focus firearms on family.

Another good rule! ;)

Rustmeister said...

LOl yeah, I guess it is.

MadRocketScientist said...

Just to be difficult (kinda), children can learn the same lesson from a parent who uses violence to settle disputes in the home. If dad beats mom when mom is not acting the way dad wants, and junior sees it, then junior learns that violence is how to get people to act a certain way for you.

Except junior is not physically intimidating to the people at school who pick on him, so he needs to change the force dynamic...

Rustmeister said...

Very true, I'm sure that's also a piece of the puzzle.